Eigo wa hanasu hito wa imasen-ka? *

Long long time ago, when I was an under grad student, someone told me that chances of employment in software firms are high if you know Japanese. (Apparently it has something to do with the fact that the company may have clients in Japan and you might have to go onsite and then your Japanese skills become wieldy and so you are the more attractive candidate for the job. More on pre-placement myths soon. Watch this blog! :-) ) Then my industrious cousin M started going for Jap classes (I can't tell you more than this about M, he's threatened to sue if I make fun of him on my blog) At about the same time my friend D who had taken up Japansese in her college, wrote my name in Japanese on a scrap of paper. The squiggles looked so cute and I felt that I just HAD to learn how to do them.

Then PS 2 happened in Bangalore and dutifully I went around searching for classes. I found one and almost paid the money when I discovered that the place was called "Learn Spoken English". Worse still they had a huge board advertising this outside the building, on the building and in a few places leading to the building. Since I had got the number of the place from someone and had conducted the preliminary investigations over the phone, this fact had eluded me for long. That was a cheesy position to be in! The snob in me decided that I couldn't be seen entering that place, lest people (read handsome guys who had the potential to be future bfs) think I know no ingles! I told them I would be back in 2 days to pay the money and successfully avoided that place by taking a more circuitous route to work.

Then I was back in Pilani for my psenti sem (final semester) and the first thing I noticed when they gave us the timetable book is that Beginning Japanese was now offered as an audit course (Audit course means you pay extra for that and it doesn't contribute to your CGPA) Expectedly I was one of the first to register and roped in S also. The first class was nice, we sat on the first bench. The instructor squiggled on the board and I dutifully re-squiggled them on my new note book that had "Beginning Japanese" (in capital letters) written on the cover. And then the instructor asked me to come and squiggle on the black board and feeling like kindergarden kid I wrote (or drew) something on the board and blushed with pride when she told me my answer was right.

Campus interviews were on and like 95% of the BITSians I also made a job in the first week. And then my enthusiam for Jap waned a little. Now that I had a job at hand it seemed silly to learn Japanese. But a cursory query revealed that audit courses could not be dropped - not only would you lose your money, but it will listed on your transcript with an E grade (Unsatisfactory). I was no A student, but the thought of an E was somehow disturbing. Then I remembered that it was all about cute squiggles and I started attending classes.

The classes graduated from boring to un-non-sleepable. The squiggles weren't so cute anymore. And writing on the board was embarassing 'coz I didn't know any answers. S became the star pupil though. She discovered that she had been a Japanese citizen in her previous birth and attacked the language with a vengeance. And I started doodling in class instead of squiggling. I mastered Hiragana when the class had almost finished Katagana and when I started learning Katagana, I forgot Hiragana. And by the time we started doings kanjis, I had given up on my Japanese dreams and started taking care of my life. Meanwhile S carried on being the starriest student in class and by association the hapless instructor assumed I was good too. When I stopped attending classes, she passed on umpteen messaged through S, asking me to be regular. And caught me three times on the road and once in the temple and made me promise to attend classes - which I didn't!

One fine day, in the middle of the farewell parties, S nonchalently told me that the Jap compree (final exam) was scheduled for the next day. I scowled at everyone in sight and spent the whole night discerning Hiragana, Katagana and Kanji. The day dawned with a fierce dust storm (the fierecest I have ever seen in Pilani) and I trudged to FD I (the building where the exam was taking place) and squiggled away to glory. I knew a few answers and "inteligently guessed" the rest.

I got my papers a few days later and made a E anyways. I swore at my Japanese instructor, the Japanese language, Chinesese language, software firm with Japanese clients, my Japanese instructor again, sushi, Hiragana, Katagana and Kanji and my Japanese instructor yet again in order.

The sem was over and holidays flew by and I joined my present company. People told me that there was there was this guy who was BITSian too and thamizh and from Chennai and from my school. The heart went out to him as a fellow survivor and I was determined to make his acquaintance. Just before I could go and meet him, the person who told me about him said "You might have heard about him in BITS. He is Prof T's brother-in-law. Yeah his sister (T's wife i.e) took Japanese classes too". I stopped in my tracks and till date haven't exchanged even a smile with him! :-)

* - Is there anyone who speaks English?